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It's pun time again...

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Gives Up! '
Gives Up! '
Posts: 1934
Joined: 30th Apr 2005
Location: UK
quotePosted at 16:14 on 5th May 2009
1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi. 

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian . 

3. She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still. 

4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption. 

5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work. 

6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery. 

7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering. 

8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart. 

9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. 

10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. 

11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it. 

12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. 

13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.' 

14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then, it hit me. 

15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said, 'Keep off the Grass.' 

16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.' 

17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion. 

18. It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it. 

19. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large. 

20. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran. 

21. A backward poet writes inverse. 

22. In democracy, it's your vote that counts. In feudalism, it's your count that votes. 

23 . When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion. 

24. Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects.
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Cathy E.
Cathy E.
Posts: 8474
Joined: 15th Aug 2008
Location: USA
quotePosted at 16:52 on 5th May 2009
Babs, they are great!!! Thanks for sharing.
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Shirley K. Lawson
Shirley K. Lawson
Posts: 2310
Joined: 17th Jul 2008
Location: USA
quotePosted at 17:31 on 5th May 2009
those are truly cute Barb..thanks for sharing them!
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Ruth Gregory
Ruth Gregory
Posts: 8072
Joined: 25th Jul 2007
Location: USA
quotePosted at 19:20 on 5th May 2009

ROFL, Babs!

 

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Richard Sellers
Richard Sellers
Posts: 4691
Joined: 16th Jul 2008
Location: USA
quotePosted at 19:24 on 5th May 2009
LOL !!!!! and,,,LOL !!!!!
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Gives Up! '
Gives Up! '
Posts: 1934
Joined: 30th Apr 2005
Location: UK
quotePosted at 20:32 on 5th May 2009
Glad you liked them.....I nicked them off another site....Tongue out
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Diana Sinclair
Diana Sinclair
Posts: 10119
Joined: 3rd Apr 2008
Location: USA
quotePosted at 20:48 on 5th May 2009
Cute! LOL! Laughing
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Bob T
Bob T
Posts: 934
Joined: 8th Jan 2009
Location: USA
quotePosted at 22:30 on 5th May 2009

Cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny

A gross of gross grouse is a hundred and forty-four foul fowl

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Debbie Adams
Debbie Adams
Posts: 2043
Joined: 8th Mar 2009
Location: USA
quotePosted at 02:31 on 6th May 2009
LMAO!!!!
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Ray Stear
Ray Stear
Posts: 1930
Joined: 25th Apr 2008
Location: UK
quotePosted at 02:47 on 6th May 2009

                              Survey of Dwarfs

 

Apparently six out of seven said they were not happy.

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