There are some people in life that one can do without!

Whilst using a so-called 'social' media site, I clearly must have inadvertantly clicked on a 'friend request' for a POE member, who has responded to me in Facebook by posting the following message. Then she blocked me from responding to her post, I am to say the least shocked.

However, I know she still looks in on POE and so I thought I would let the members know how unkind this person can be, despite her own "better than thou" attitude that she accuses me of and maybe they might then 'block her' out of their life completely, because we can all do without this sort of nonsense and abuse, and that's exactly what it is abuse and obscenity, which you won't find on POE of course. You will see that I have had to edit the post to make it acceptable here.

She once telephoned me from the States asking that I arrange a surprise birthday cake for a male friend here in England (which I did) and complained bitterly because I once called a woman driver a 'silly bitch' yet it's okay for her to use a similar reference in her abusive post on Facebook to me.

One thing is for sure, I won't be losing any sleep over it and the members must make up their own mind as to whether they bother to answer her posts in future.

So who is this person you are asking? Well following is the post that she clearly didn't want the POE members to see, or she would have posted it here, but in any case it's content would have meant it would need to be edited. She may well post overnight whilst I'm sleeping, but if the reply is abusive I will delete it and her POE account also, I hope that won't be necessary.

Seen a few of the interchanges on POE previously Ron and gotta say i could see no reason for the attitude in them. Something must have happened recently cos she had been a very regular and friendly member when I first joined up but people change. Shall not be losing any sleep myself, far more trivial things to worry about. Like my glass is empty so must be bed time!!!!

Nothing has happened that I know of Dave.

No contact, no comment and am I worried no, it's a shame she has had such a hard life and can't work out who her friends really are, or were!

She could of course have contacted me privately through POE had she got something to say, but in fact chose to post it on Facebook and then block any response from me.

Hi Ron

There is always one bad apple and the solution as we all know is to throw it out.

When abusive language is directed at any person over a forum site then it is time for that perpetrator to leave.

I am not a prude but I cringe at some of the comments that are allowed over the net on Facebook.

When allowed to continue it then becomes a breeding ground for cyber bullies surely you would think that FB have a triggering system to filter out abusive words and in turn cut the account out of the system.

Here on POE we have a friendly Moderator just to keep a watchful eye on the forum.

Kick her OUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT    

Thank you for your support Dave, Neil.

If you searched back through the posts you would very soon see who was being hostile, and that is after I had gone out of my way to help.

The fact that she went to FB and posted, presumably so that POE members wouldn't see what she had to say is what gets me. Well I am made of sterner stuff, but not inflexible!

When i first came across this site i was amazed how friendly ALL of the members were this is one of the reasons i stayed.

I have had contact with this person a few times and always found her a very friendly lady --maybe we are seeing a different side of her now.

I hope it is soon sorted as i dont think it is a good thing for the site so i say do as you think best Ron i am sure the genuine members will be behind you on this.

Thanks for your support James.

I won't be doing anything in a hurry. In fact, unless the abuse arrives on our doorstep again I will leave the account alone. The reason being I believe she is probably already sorry for her outburst and it was probably as a result of a bad day at work, or with her daughter, although that's no excuse. Will she remove the post on fb, I doubt it.

What it does do is let POE members see what she didn't want you to read.

I agree with Neil that the abuse and obscene language on these so called 'social' media sites is anything but social, it's unacceptable and should be stopped, because it does act as a breeding ground for all sorts of trouble which reflects throughout society and often gets played out in the streets of most Countries today. Then of course there are the tragic cases of the young people taking their own life as a result. Well I have got news for my abuser, if you think I'm going to top myself as a result of your rubbish you can think again.

And yes Dave you are correct, that was just one demand she made (probably looking for an excuse not to donate)

I can't comment on this much, because I don't know the lady concerned, but you should not have to put up with this kind of abuse Ron, I think you do a great job on POE, and you are always helpful and friendly, I would just ignore her Ron, and would advise other members to do the same, should they want to.

I'm right behind you on this one Ron, we don't need that kind of behaviour on this wonderful site, we're all supposed to be friends here

The problem is neatly summed up by the Latin expression 'ad hominem' which literally means 'to the person'. Message boards should always prohibit 'ad hominem' posts, ie those posts which are personal attacks rather than reasoned arguments.

I have only once experienced a personal attack from another member of PoE. He has removed all his pictures from PoE,  but his offensive posts remain as a reminder that what is launched into cyberspace never really disappears. It is a wounding experience, but I can only conclude that this individual had issues with other people too.

To our friend Ron, I would echo the advice of Mike T, and think of the Beatles song 'Let it Be'.