How do you deal with guests who outstay their welcome?

Or maybe you don't mind! 

If I have people around who just don't seem to want to go home, then I say, "Oh, have you ever met our milkman?" Or something else like, " I'm just going to open my blinds, the sunrise is fantastic at this time of year in this window"   

They usually take the hint! LOL! 

Sarcasm, you can't beat it!  (Although it is the lowest form of wit!) 

My father used to go upstairs and return a few minutes later in his dressing gown over his PJs. Caused laughter but the point did strike home.

 Depends, most the time I find an real busy schedule and take them along with me, after an couple of days, they are ready to go home...but it depends on the person, some of the young kids I've had didnt' have an place to go "home" to so all I could do in that case was given them some money and tell them quite simply that I felt they needed to get themsevels "emancipated" by the courts so they can have the rights of adults and earn an living...that it is probably safer to do that then trying to live with someone and whomever they could find that would take them in.  But the area merchandisers know that I help the kids..and they have been really good to me at times, Allowing me to have "free" backpacks for them for instance. It's not recongized by the local authorites but the kids themselves have an underground sort of railroad for helping each other these days. That's how I received the young gal I did, the people she had been staying with moved out one day and forgot to tell her. I had an spare bedroom. I let her stay overnight and the next morning I asked her what was really up, that I could tell my son didn't really know her, so she told me. So I let her clean up, washed her clothes... and I took her out for an huge breakfast..which she ate the toast and kept the later for dinner, and I gave her $20 and she said she would look into another friend perhaps..now she had been doing this she told me for 3 years then. Then I gave her another $5 for transportation into Portland and phone calls. Bought her an bag of chips and snack foods for later on also. But I knew that they most the time went to those teen places down there and stayed awake most the night and slept days at the Library or college area's. She felt with the weekend coming up that she'd most likely find someone to go home with again if her friend wasn't to be found. This is sad people, we need free places where teens can stay with no questions asked in this city...and surrounding areas of Portland. they proposed it one time and never actually did it.  I've had kids here from aruguemtns with there parents, which they can only stay overnight if they contact their parents first, I've had kids here whom locked themselves out of their own house and the parents were off to some meeting across country,I had one kid that showed up said that he was an street kid also, but on his own, his parent was an alcoholic, and the people they gave him as "foster" parents were so far removed from reality these days, he didn't want to stay there, he felt so enstranged from them. I've had an few kids that just wanted to see what life without rules and regualtions included...they found out they still existed. But it would of been nice if we'd have some place these kids could sleep and get an decent meal at besides me...without charge, if I can, I tried to find them "jobs" which greatly help them.  I am reading on Yahoo today that unemployment has slowed down to only 539,000 people for the month of April..how nice. It is not like the frontier days over here where they can live off the land any more... though they generally try to. But the young kids are an saving grace to many of them..I think the parents would be proud in some of the things they do, like say they lost an sweatshirt, when they really gave it away. Give their food receipt to someone that has no food for lunch, so they can go back and say they had something missing in the sack. share clothes in general to keep costs down, allow others to stay in tents outside in the yard saying they are "camping" with an friend, when they really aren't...they arr putting someone up for the weekend.I find the kids much more humanitarian then are the parents and authorties...an police record doesn't help them in the long run...it makes employers mistrust them knowing they are run aways. I have always maintaned, no drugs, no smoking, no liquor in my house if your staying here. for the hard core street kid, they leave readily on their own, they are drifters anyway by then ...I also don't preach to them, make then say prayers, nor "mother" them for the most part..but I do try to help if I can...they need jobs mor ethen anything. They are not an part of the 148 other kids I've had here for some reason or another....those kids were average kids with parents and homes they were living in. Now you know why I am not rich, I've never made an dime off any of them. I've given $20 and I put them to "work" for $100 at something needing done in house repairs or painting...helping me take stuff to the dump, always there's something they can do. It gives them self-respect to earn it. Ocassionally I hear from them also later on. I've talked to two of them that were from California, another kid got an job and an life and retuned to me the money I gave him back then... it surprises me at times...as they know my help comes with no strings attached. but it shows character of some of them if given an chance. Other then this stuff, I can't think of anyone that bothers me over-staying when not welcomed.           

Our neighbour two doors up used to come round for hours. We were always too polite to get rid of her. Now her and her son are making our lives a misery (he is the one who owns the Iceland van and parks it outside our house and not his own and has the friends who block our drive). Maybe if I had been more firm with her in the past they wouldn't be treating us like this now.

LOL! Stephanie, you story makes me think of an incident that is somewhat different but funny.

Many years ago while at a party at a friend's house another guest arrived who smelled so bad that the householder shoved a bar of soap into his hands and told him he could stay only if he went upstairs to take a shower first. LOL.

I should probably stipulate that the offending person was a mutual friend of ours who had a reputation for bad hygiene. It was not health related; he was just lazy about his hygiene.

Lmao Diana! My BIL used to come to our home stinking like that, my son who was then only a kid, used to spray air freshner all over the place saying, "It stinks in here" 

Kids, they don't beat about the bush!