Tell me a joke.... Please???

**Please support PoE by donating today - thank you**

< Prev 1 2 3 4 5 Next >

	Forums > Off-Topic_Chat > Tell me a joke.... Please???
Bob T Posts: 934 Joined: 8th Jan 2009 Location: USA	quotePosted at 23:11 on 13th January 2009 A guy walks in to a pub with a frog on his head. The barkeep asks, "What's up with that?" The frog says, "Well, it all started out as a wart on my butt. Hope you feel better! My favourite: Pictures \| Towns \| Attractions
Bob T Posts: 934 Joined: 8th Jan 2009 Location: USA	quotePosted at 23:13 on 13th January 2009 Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other, "Does this taste funny to you?" My favourite: Pictures \| Towns \| Attractions
Bob T Posts: 934 Joined: 8th Jan 2009 Location: USA	quotePosted at 23:27 on 13th January 2009 Why men shouldn't write an advice column... Dear Bob, I hope you can help me here. The other day, I set off for work leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual. I hadn't driven more than a mile down the road when the engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt. I walked back home to get my husband's help. When I got home I couldn't believe my eyes. He was in our bedroom with the neighbor's daughter. I am 32, my husband is 34, and the neighbor girl is 22. We have been married for ten years. When I confronted him, he broke down and admitted that they had been having an affair for the past six months. I told him to stop or I would leave him. He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. He won't go to counseling and I'm afraid I can't get through to him anymore. Can you please help? Sincerely, Sheila ****************************** Dear Sheila: A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the vacuum pipes and hoses on the intake manifold and also check all grounding wires. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburetor float chamber. I hope this helps! Bob My favourite: Pictures \| Towns \| Attractions
Gives Up! ' Posts: 1934 Joined: 30th Apr 2005 Location: UK	quotePosted at 23:32 on 13th January 2009 A man boards a bus with a dog under his arm. The bus driver says, "My god what an ugly pig!" The man says, "Hey, it's not a pig it's a dog!" Bus driver says, "I was talking to the dog!" My favourite: Pictures \| Towns \| Attractions
Bob T Posts: 934 Joined: 8th Jan 2009 Location: USA	quotePosted at 23:36 on 13th January 2009 A woman gets on a bus with a pig under her arm, the driver says, "Where'd you get that ugly thing?" The pig replies, "I won her in a raffle." Edited by: Bob T at:13th January 2009 23:36 My favourite: Pictures \| Towns \| Attractions
Bob T Posts: 934 Joined: 8th Jan 2009 Location: USA	quotePosted at 23:37 on 13th January 2009 Three guys walk into a bar...the fourth one ducked. My favourite: Pictures \| Towns \| Attractions
Gives Up! ' Posts: 1934 Joined: 30th Apr 2005 Location: UK	quotePosted at 23:38 on 13th January 2009 @ Bob!!! A man is talking to the family doctor. "Doc, I think my wife's going deaf." The doctor answers, "Well, here's something you can try on her to test her hearing. Stand some distance away from her and ask her a question. If she doesn't answer, move a little closer and ask again. Keep repeating this until she answers. Then you'll be able to tell just how hard of hearing she really is." The man goes home and tries it out. He walks in the door and says, "Honey, what's for dinner?" He doesn't hear an answer, so he moves closer to her. "Honey, what's for dinner?" Still no answer. He repeats this several times, until he's standing just a few feet away from her. Finally, she answers, "For the eleventh time, I said we're having MEATLOAF!" My favourite: Pictures \| Towns \| Attractions
Gives Up! ' Posts: 1934 Joined: 30th Apr 2005 Location: UK	quotePosted at 23:40 on 13th January 2009 A man walks into the sheriff's office... "I want to become a deputy!" "Good, I want to you to catch this man" says the sheriff handling the man a wanted poster. The poster reads : 'Last seen wearing a brown paper hat, brown paper shirt, brown paper pants, and brown paper boots.' "What's he wanted for?" asked the hopeful yound man. "Rustling." My favourite: Pictures \| Towns \| Attractions
Bob T Posts: 934 Joined: 8th Jan 2009 Location: USA	quotePosted at 23:47 on 13th January 2009 A teacher at a veterinary school was indoctrinating new students in the anatomy lab. On the table under a sheet lay a cow’s carcass. He explains to the students, “Now, you need to get over your squeamishness and to help you do that I am asking you to do exactly as I do.” At that, he uncovers the rear of the cow, sticks a bare finger up her tuckus then places it in his mouth. The students were disgusted, but in order to receive a passing grade, they all complied and did the same. Having done that, the teacher then told them that observation is EQUALLY important and explained that while he stuck his index finger in the cow, he placed his middle finger in his mouth. My favourite: Pictures \| Towns \| Attractions
Ruth Gregory Posts: 8072 Joined: 25th Jul 2007 Location: USA	quotePosted at 04:06 on 14th January 2009 Good ones, Barb and Bob! My favourite: Pictures \| Towns \| Attractions