Blond jokes, Or Essex girls.

Two blonds were driving down to Disneyworld. After about three hours of driving they came to a signe that read, " Disneyworld left". So they turned round and went home.

There were two blonds standing on oposite banks of a river. The one on the south bank shouted to the girl on the north bank, "How do I get to the other side?"  The blond on the north bank shouted back, " Idiot, your there already".

Thanks for doin the dirty work, Peter.  lol

An Essex girl was shoppin at Makro, (it's supposed to be a blonde shopping at K Mart, but I Englishized it). lol  She came across a shiny silver thermos and was quite fascinated by it, so she brought it over to the clerk to ask what it was.  The clerk said, "Why a thermos.  It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold.  "Wow," said the blonde, "that's amazing!"

So she brought it to work the next day.  Her boss, also an Essex girl, asked, "What's that?"  A thermos, keeps hot things hot and cold things cold.  "Wow, that's amazing," says the boss.  "What did you bring in it?" 

Two popsicles and some coffee

Nice one Ruth. They are definately Essex girls. He he he.

A car was driving down the street when all of a sudden it started swerving.  The car was going back and forth till someone with a cell phone called the police. 

A police officer pulled the car over.  A blonde rolls down the window and says, " Officer, I'm so glad you are here.  I saw a tree in the road, then I saw another.  So I  had to swerve to keep from hitting it!" 

The officer looks at her, then says, "Ma'am, that's your air freshener."

I love that air freshener joke! LOL@Lyn

Ruth....Loved that one about the restroom  too! 

Ray 

Good one Peter!

Ray. 

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.

"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"
The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"
The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."

A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."